Amusing News Aliquots

Silly samplings of this week's science news, compiled by Sophia Cai, Bethany Halford, and Jeff Huber.
Scientists did do pretty much everything else to get this yogurt to you.  #howmatters Credit: twitter user @piperjklemm

Scientists did pretty much everything else to get this yogurt to you.
Credit: twitter user @piperjklemm

Chobani claims scientists have nothing to do with their 100-calorie yogurt. That’s a relief since science is, after all, “an adulterant known to dramatically inflate calorie count.” [Popular Science] “Finally, scientific research on kissing!” nerds everywhere cheer. Some result tidbits: Men who kiss their wives before work live 5 years longer, make 20-30% more money and are far less likely to get in a car accident. [Time] Have you ever thought your coworker was behaving like an ape? Then you'll sympathize with the Spanish zookeeper who mistook a costumed coworker for a gorilla and shot him with a tranquilizer dart. [ShortList] More primate news! Caltech scientists have observed that chimpanzees outperform humans in hide-and-seek. It's the kind of news that would make humans hide in shame, if they weren't already so bad at hiding. [ScienceDaily] Evolution not shocked that it still faces an uphill battle. Population that believes God created humans in their present form within the last 10,000 years: 42% of Americans, 22% of Canadians/Brits, 8% of Norwegians. [Gallup via io9] Beer actually grows on trees in India. College students, start booking your spring-break flights now. [International Business News] A sea snail’s tongue looks like a conveyer belt studded with rows and rows of pointy teeth (and other nifty science close-ups). [Humans Invent] Lemurs love pink flamingos. We hear they’re less keen on Polyester and Hairspray though. [io9]  

Author: Bethany Halford

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  1. Actually, lemurs think Polyester and Hairspray are divine.