Getting Down On One Knee … With A Physics Paper

The seven-year relationship of two physicists has moved to the next level, thanks to a marriage proposal Brandon wrote to Christie in the form of a physics paper. The faux academic article, titled “Two Body Interactions: A Longitudinal Study,” is dated March 2012, but hit Reddit‘s cyberspace — and achieved cyber fame — at the end of last month.

This paper proposal was posted to Reddit with the label: "My boyfriend of 7 years and I are both physicists. Here's how he proposed to me."

This paper proposal was posted to Reddit with the label: “My boyfriend of 7 years and I are both physicists. Here’s how he proposed to me.”


The paper discusses how they met: “The study began on the 23rd of March, 05, outside a SciSoc BBQ at the Eastern Avenue Building, when the subject spontaneously appeared in a red coat and a grey ‘Paddington bear’ hat and was similarly spontaneously introduced by a local social node.”

It then goes on to explain the stresses that tested the long-distance relationship between Brandon and Christie: “The locational dependence of the results was tested across two main long term locations as well as a multitude of short term locations local, interstate, and international.”

And finally how they moved in together: “The third phase of the study involved isolating the two body interaction in a new long term location, while continuing the above mentioned tests.”

The paper even includes a graph of happiness over time, with a predicted upward trend in the happier-as-time-goes-on direction.

And for the paper’s conclusion …

… Brandon writes: “Taking these results into account, the author proposes to Christie the indefinite continuation of the study. The subject’s response to this proposal should be indicated below,” which is followed by ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ check boxes. (Spoiler alert: The ‘Yes’ box is checked.)

Reddit users are largely congratulatory of the couple and their nerdy science selves. Comments include: “Has it been Peer-reviewed? If not, the results could be bogus. But seriously: congratulations : ),” “This is the most complicated ‘CHECK THIS BOX IF YOU LIKE ME’ note ever written,” and “I’d like to replicate this study.”

Author: Sophia Cai

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1 Comment

  1. Random thought–I’ve always wondered who was the first to apply the phrase “two-body problem” to dual career/long distance relationship things.